Parents Know Best

Last night was the first night at Religious Ed. (or CCD or PSR...  or whatever the trend is these days...) at our parish. All the kiddos were in their classes while their parents were in a meeting.  I took this opportunity to talk to all the classes about getting involved in youth group.  For street cred, I brought along three teens to share their experiences (for the record, highlights included, "going to a real mall at the March for Life" and "CLI is the first time I sprained my ankle!" and me assuring the kids that we didn't just shop and get injured at youth group.)

En route to the different classes, they asked said, "hey, Miss Alison, what's going on in there".
"That's the parent's meeting".
"Can we talk to them?"
"you want to talk to parents?".
"Well, duh, Miss Alison.  They're the ones that take their kids to youth group.  They need to know how important it is."
Then the next one chimed in,   "I mean, I wouldn't have gone if my mom hadn't made me go the first time.  It's like, super important for them to know that they need to force their kids to go cause they won't want to at first.  But it's really important they they make them go, cause it changes everything."

Wow.  Wish the parent's meeting hadn't ended before we finished talking to the 6th graders.
These kids have figured a lot out.
Parents, never doubt your influence.

can my sister send you mail?

Hi all.  My sister, Martha, is awesome and recently graduated from Ave Maria University.  I'm super-proud of her because she's making a two year commitment to FOCUS.  I'll let her explain why:


For the next two years, I'll be working with an organization called FOCUS, or Fellowship of Catholic University Students. This ministry sends missionaries to colleges in the United States to aid young people in their drawing closer to God and in their battle against the negative elements of today's culture. FOCUS specifically seeks to meet these students where they're at by having its missionaries strive to come to know the personal needs of the students they encounter and to share Christ's love with them. What was instrumental in my decision to become a FOCUS missionary was a realization of what an awesome gift the Catholic faith is through spending four years an Ave Maria University, drawing closer to God during this time through the spiritual and academic opportunities that the school made possible for me. Basically, Catholicism is way too awesome not to share, and I know that the hope it offers is much needed in the lives of my peers! -Martha Griswold



If you know Martha, you know that she's going to be absolutely amazing at this-- I've been blessed to encounter many people who tangibly represent Christ to me, but no one is quite like Martha and I know she's going to make a huge difference in the lives of the students she'll encounter.  However, here's the thing.  She's off to FOCUS training and is supposed to have something like 200 addresses of people she can mail her newsletter updates to and ask for prayers and financial support.  Giving her your address in NO way means you have to pray for or financially support her (although clearly she would not be opposed to either cause she prays for ALL of you...  Yes, even you...) it would just get her off to a strong start.  You don't need to be rich, Catholic or even able to read.  You just need a mailbox.  So, if you're willing to get updates in the mail from Martha, please e-mail (or Facebook) her your address: mgriswold@focusonline.org




****also. I'm late to the game here, but apparently my Christendom alumni sister Emily has already collected about 25 addresses from the Front Royal/ Christendom crowd. I'm BEGGING my Franuniv friends to not let them out-do us.

In hectic lives, it's the small moments that count most

Originally published in The Bluffton Packet, February 28, 2010

I rarely arrive at work before our parochial school begins, which is at something like 8 a.m. -- an hour when I doubt even God is awake. But the other day I was in my office at 7:30 a.m., my eyeballs propped open with caffeine, watching the kiddos being dropped off for school, and I saw something that really left an impression on me.

I already thought it was pretty benevolent of parents to give their kids a ride to school -- my friends and I, back in the day, used to have to take what we affectionately referred to as "the big cheese," aka the bus.

Then I saw something that restored my faith in humanity, at least for the next few hours. A father, dressed for work, got out of his car and tossed a football with his son on the lawn for a few minutes before school. It was so Hallmark meets Norman Rockwell that I wanted to take a picture of it -- but quickly realized that would be creepy.

Instead, I reflected on the moment. It's clichè to say, but it's actions like this one that make all the difference for kids.

I once saw a billboard outside of a church that read, "Kids spell 'love' 'T-I-M-E." There are so many big decisions to make as a parent -- where to send your kids to school, who their pediatrician should be, whether the kids should play soccer or baseball -- that the smaller things, like just spending a few minutes truly focused on each other, can get lost in the shuffle.

I can only imagine how difficult it is for families to make "T-I-M-E" in their incredibly busy lives, especially on those days when the kids are just not that easy to be around. I'm sure there are days when it would be tempting to drop off the kids at school early and then use those extra minutes to run to Starbucks before work. But, as a parent, you are the most important person in your child's world. Don't take this as a guilt trip, but as encouragement. Study after study shows this is true -- that's why so much money is put into the "Parents: The anti-drug" campaign.

It might take a village to raise a child, but you are the only permanent residents. The coolest teachers and coaches (and even youth ministers having a great hair day) do not have the same influence as you do.

The beauty of this is that making a difference and being present in your child's life doesn't require fancy activities, expensive programs or grand plans.

Just you.

The football toss I witnessed is just one example of a parent taking time out of the day to be present for his son. Other great opportunities for stealing a moment are: during car trips -- with the radio and phones shut off, of course -- while grocery shopping, at dinnertime or even doing household chores together, such as cooking or cleaning. I know that these are the moments I remember most from my childhood. As a bonus, that question or issue your kids really want to talk to you about most likely will bubble to the surface during these moments together -- when their guards are down and they feel most at ease.

Parents have the hardest job in the world -- long hours, lots of sacrifice, rarely being thanked or acknowledged for your effort. But persevere. Your love makes all the difference.