There’s a new teen night in town, have your kids heard about it? It features topless underage girls, any type of language is permitted and slanderous rumors spread like crazy. Kids come and go—some able to shrug off the insults that are hurled at them, while others are devastated by the damage to their reputation. At least two have killed themselves because of their experiences of being harassed. Disturbed? Look no further than your child’s phone or facebook. It’s where it’s all happening these days.
In no way does it make up for the offense to humanity that is “Jersey Shore”, but my friend alerted me to a helpful resource MTV has set up to educate teens and parents about the dangers of bullying on-line, via text messages and the trend of “sexting” (sending sexual photos on ones cell phone). Anyone who knows me knows that I’m a text and twitter addict, but these resources can be abused. Phones and facebook are not evil, but poor supervision is causing a world of hurt and permanent damage to teens and their reputations. On www.athinline.org, MTV displays information that everyone should know about before they take pictures or share information on their phone or internet.
Even when teens are with their friends it’s not unusual to see their phones in hand, fingers constantly fluttering over their keypads, either texting friends not present or, in a more advanced maneuver, “table texting” the people next to them to say things they don’t want the rest of the group to hear. I often complain that texting is affecting their ability to socialize—you’d be worried if your kids were only speaking in spurts of 140 letters at a time—but now it’s becoming evident that hurtful words and images said are spreading much faster than an old-fashioned note on paper ever did.
This isn’t just a case of “kids saying the darndest things”. Whether it be comments on a profile or photo album, texts or pictures, it’s slanderous and sometimes even illegal. When I stumble upon any kind of drama with teens, my initial reaction is to hope that they’ll work it out as the adults that they are becoming, but I am realizing that teens need more guidance and at times intervention from parents and other adults when it comes to this new social venue. Technology is confusing and it’s challenging to navigate the profiles, passwords and trends but as adults we must mentor youth, even if it means doing a little research first.
Sirach 6:5-6 warns that “a kind mouth multiplies friends, and gracious lips prompt friendly greetings. Let your acquaintances be many, but one in a thousand your confidant”. This is sound advice for social networking and texting. The words that we say-- whether typed, twittered or texted-- are permanent and can be passed around cyberspace indefinitely. In a world where we’re so cautious about where children are and who they’re with, we need to recognize just how far the boundaries of a cell phone or facebook profile extend and be just as vigilant about what is said and done.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Faith and Works
Faith and Works:
Watching winter sports is fascinating. I can relate to track and field, soccer, volleyball and other stuff that used to happen in gym class but things like curling, skiing and the luge completely elude me. Besides my brief, tragic experiences on the rink in Savannah I have very little knowledge of what snow and ice are actually like, so the winter Olympics might as well be held on the moon—life in Vancouver is just as foreign.
I didn’t even know that ice hockey was a legit sport (I thought that “The Mighty Ducks” was based on a game made up for the sake of the story, like Quidditch) until spending four years in Ohio where people come from states with actual teams and had opinions about which is best. Like any sport, I usually only express interest if it helps strike up conversation with a cute boy, but last Sunday evening I found myself watching the U.S. vs. Canada hockey game for it’s own sake. It was exciting and violent.
Watching the instant re-play of the final goal for team US, my friend remarked that Canada had removed their goalie to have an extra man on offense. As I’ve said, I know very little about sports and especially nothing about hockey, but I remember from my Island Rec Center soccer days that a goal should not be left un-tended (or no oranges at team snack-time). I understand that this is a last-ditch strategy that occasionally works, but to me it seems foolish to leave a goal completely un-tended.
It did make me think that the balance of defense and offense is an analogy for the spiritual life (I acknowledge that’s a strange way to see a game. I can’t help it.) Soccer, hockey, basketball and all those sports that require attention to both scoring and defending the goal demonstrate the need to balance our faith and our actions. You can’t win a game without scoring points against the other team just like you can’t grow closer to Christ without following him with actions like service and worship. Volunteer work, mission trips and singing hymns are actions that draw us closer to God. However, actions are not enough.
As Canada painfully learned, defense is also critical to winning. A team could score a hundred points and lose if the other team scored a hundred and one. Similarly it’s not enough to be a nice person doing nice things if we want to grow closer to Christ. It’s also necessary to nurture and defend our faith against the influence of evil and doubt. In his letter to Timothy, Paul reminded him “to stir into flame the gift of God you have…for God did not give us a spirit of cowardice but rather of power and love and self-control” (2 Timothy 1:6-7). Faith is nurtured through prayer, scripture and rejecting evil. Those following Christ have a real enemy waiting to step in and score when their defenses are down.
The book of James summarizes this balance, explaining that belief in God is important, but “even the demons believe that” (James 2:19). There must be a balance of both faith in God and action, “see how a person is justified by works and not by faith alone… just as a body without a spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead” (James 2:24, 26). St. Augustine summarized this balance, saying, “pray as if everything depends on God, and work as if everything depends on us”.
Watching winter sports is fascinating. I can relate to track and field, soccer, volleyball and other stuff that used to happen in gym class but things like curling, skiing and the luge completely elude me. Besides my brief, tragic experiences on the rink in Savannah I have very little knowledge of what snow and ice are actually like, so the winter Olympics might as well be held on the moon—life in Vancouver is just as foreign.
I didn’t even know that ice hockey was a legit sport (I thought that “The Mighty Ducks” was based on a game made up for the sake of the story, like Quidditch) until spending four years in Ohio where people come from states with actual teams and had opinions about which is best. Like any sport, I usually only express interest if it helps strike up conversation with a cute boy, but last Sunday evening I found myself watching the U.S. vs. Canada hockey game for it’s own sake. It was exciting and violent.
Watching the instant re-play of the final goal for team US, my friend remarked that Canada had removed their goalie to have an extra man on offense. As I’ve said, I know very little about sports and especially nothing about hockey, but I remember from my Island Rec Center soccer days that a goal should not be left un-tended (or no oranges at team snack-time). I understand that this is a last-ditch strategy that occasionally works, but to me it seems foolish to leave a goal completely un-tended.
It did make me think that the balance of defense and offense is an analogy for the spiritual life (I acknowledge that’s a strange way to see a game. I can’t help it.) Soccer, hockey, basketball and all those sports that require attention to both scoring and defending the goal demonstrate the need to balance our faith and our actions. You can’t win a game without scoring points against the other team just like you can’t grow closer to Christ without following him with actions like service and worship. Volunteer work, mission trips and singing hymns are actions that draw us closer to God. However, actions are not enough.
As Canada painfully learned, defense is also critical to winning. A team could score a hundred points and lose if the other team scored a hundred and one. Similarly it’s not enough to be a nice person doing nice things if we want to grow closer to Christ. It’s also necessary to nurture and defend our faith against the influence of evil and doubt. In his letter to Timothy, Paul reminded him “to stir into flame the gift of God you have…for God did not give us a spirit of cowardice but rather of power and love and self-control” (2 Timothy 1:6-7). Faith is nurtured through prayer, scripture and rejecting evil. Those following Christ have a real enemy waiting to step in and score when their defenses are down.
The book of James summarizes this balance, explaining that belief in God is important, but “even the demons believe that” (James 2:19). There must be a balance of both faith in God and action, “see how a person is justified by works and not by faith alone… just as a body without a spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead” (James 2:24, 26). St. Augustine summarized this balance, saying, “pray as if everything depends on God, and work as if everything depends on us”.
Growing in Christ
There’s few things I dislike more than getting in shape. Sure, after a month of beating your body into submission, training the will and expanding your lungs, running and lifting feels slightly less torturous and you can start appreciating the endorphin high. It’s the initial days of stretching out your joints which have rusted into place after eating cheese and re-watching the first season of “Glee” that are brutal.
Like anyone in their twenties, the last several summers have become completely dedicated to weddings. While I love dressing up, it’s a reality check when you log onto Facebook that Monday to find that you’ve been tagged in multiple pictures which showcase your un-toned arms. One summer with that on your record and the motivation to exercise comes much easier. I do not want my Facebook legacy to be “fat bridesmaid”.
Even though the motivation was there, the thought of a gym left me feeling really unsettled. I put if off for a long time because I had visions of walking in and encountering the cast of “Jersey Shore”— sculpted, tanned, toned and teased. Rather than suffer such comparisons, I made some feeble attempts to get in shape on my own. This quickly left me bored—you can only do so many pilates from youtube before you lose your motivation and it’s hard to push yourself in the comfort of your own home, when no one is watching. Clearly, a gym was my only hope for actually getting in shape.
Much like the kids who are afraid of kindergarten because they don’t know how to read and people who think they are too sick to go to the doctor, it was illogical to think I had to be in shape to join a gym. I finally just went and found that while there are a few who approach Spinning with the intensity of an Olympiad (your bike is NOT MOVING! Calm down, would ya?) many are like me—pasty, average and just hoping to shed a few pounds to look good for the summer. Furthermore, there’s a camaraderie that exists among people working towards a similar goal that you just can’t get from watching “Buns of Steel” alone in your living room. A little competition encourages intensity.
Many approach religion or church with the same hesitancy. Just as I feared encountering a level of fitness that I couldn’t live up to, they expect to encounter sanctity that will make them feel inadequate. They think church is just a place for Mother Teresa and Billy Graham to have coffee and doughnuts and there’s no place for real people with real problems and sin. However, much like I could never have changed my body if if I didn't take that initial plunge and allow myself to be challenged by trainers and those around me, our souls cannot change if we attempt to do it all on our own.
Any Church community will be full of people who are very advanced in their walk with God as well as those who are just starting out. Holiness is not a competition, but we benefit from witnessing how others have handled the same challenges we face, much like I was motivated by those who could run faster and lift more than me.
In the Gospel of John, Christ reminds us, “Remain in me, as I remain in you. Just as a branch cannot bear fruit on its own unless it remains on the vine, so neither can you unless you remain in me.” (John 15:4-5). Taking the steps to be connected can be intimidating, but unless we are connected to Christ we cannot grow.
Like anyone in their twenties, the last several summers have become completely dedicated to weddings. While I love dressing up, it’s a reality check when you log onto Facebook that Monday to find that you’ve been tagged in multiple pictures which showcase your un-toned arms. One summer with that on your record and the motivation to exercise comes much easier. I do not want my Facebook legacy to be “fat bridesmaid”.
Even though the motivation was there, the thought of a gym left me feeling really unsettled. I put if off for a long time because I had visions of walking in and encountering the cast of “Jersey Shore”— sculpted, tanned, toned and teased. Rather than suffer such comparisons, I made some feeble attempts to get in shape on my own. This quickly left me bored—you can only do so many pilates from youtube before you lose your motivation and it’s hard to push yourself in the comfort of your own home, when no one is watching. Clearly, a gym was my only hope for actually getting in shape.
Much like the kids who are afraid of kindergarten because they don’t know how to read and people who think they are too sick to go to the doctor, it was illogical to think I had to be in shape to join a gym. I finally just went and found that while there are a few who approach Spinning with the intensity of an Olympiad (your bike is NOT MOVING! Calm down, would ya?) many are like me—pasty, average and just hoping to shed a few pounds to look good for the summer. Furthermore, there’s a camaraderie that exists among people working towards a similar goal that you just can’t get from watching “Buns of Steel” alone in your living room. A little competition encourages intensity.
Many approach religion or church with the same hesitancy. Just as I feared encountering a level of fitness that I couldn’t live up to, they expect to encounter sanctity that will make them feel inadequate. They think church is just a place for Mother Teresa and Billy Graham to have coffee and doughnuts and there’s no place for real people with real problems and sin. However, much like I could never have changed my body if if I didn't take that initial plunge and allow myself to be challenged by trainers and those around me, our souls cannot change if we attempt to do it all on our own.
Any Church community will be full of people who are very advanced in their walk with God as well as those who are just starting out. Holiness is not a competition, but we benefit from witnessing how others have handled the same challenges we face, much like I was motivated by those who could run faster and lift more than me.
In the Gospel of John, Christ reminds us, “Remain in me, as I remain in you. Just as a branch cannot bear fruit on its own unless it remains on the vine, so neither can you unless you remain in me.” (John 15:4-5). Taking the steps to be connected can be intimidating, but unless we are connected to Christ we cannot grow.
March for Life
When I waitressed I dreaded tables of teenagers. I would argue with my coworkers about taking the raucous high schoolers who would sit down, run you ragged re-filling their mountain dew and then tip you $1.13 for your troubles. I sympathize with the servers, baristas and counter help that gives me the “oh, why did you come here?” look when I walk into a restaurant or cafe with my youth group. And it’s not just the employees. Guests eating will also eye us with suspicion and start gathering their things ready dash at the first sign of drama.
As much as I love teenagers, I concede that the wary glances they receive when they congregate in public are somewhat rightfully earned. I’ve seen kids at their best—when they’re serving the homeless and helping elderly cross the street—but I’ve also witnessed some pretty inconsiderate and apathetic behavior. For example, once while a speaker was telling the youth group about a project to deliver clean drinking water to the third world, a teen raised their hand and asked, “but they’re like, used to walking miles to get clean water. Why do we have to change that for them?”. I died a little on the inside, convinced somewhere an angel lost its wings and that there was no hope for the future if kids could be this apathetic and insensitive to those in need.
However, these past few weeks have left me pretty inspired and hopeful for this generation. Regardless of how you feel about the issue of Roe vs. Wade and abortion, I’ve been very encouraged that kids aren’t just “waiting on the world to change”.
Each year on the anniversary of Roe vs. Wade people opposed to and in favor of abortion congregate in Washington D.C. As a Catholic youth group (and fans of “Juno”), we have talked about abortion and many of my teens feel strongly that it should not be legal. They believe it’s affected their world, as they say, “like, Miss Alison, there have been over a million abortions each year? That’s probably why there are no cute boys in my class!”. They asked me if I would take them to D.C. to peacefully protest this law with others from around the country.
We went and it was no vacation. We slept on the bus and on the floor of a gym, didn’t shower for three days, ate peanut butter sandwiches and braved the cold weather to take a stand for what we believed in. We prayed for our country, our leaders and for a greater respect of all human life. Through it all they were peaceful, respectful, attentive and never complained about the challenges of the trip.
There were 32 youth and 13 adults from Hilton Head who joined 200,000 others in DC on January 22. What struck me and many others was how many of those gathered were teenagers. Journalist Robert McCartney and Roe vs. Wade supporter observed, “I was especially struck by the large number of young people” who attended. (Washington Post, Sunday, January 24, 2010). I too could not believe that I was not the only adult crazy enough to attempt such a trip, there were high schools, colleges and youth groups (and youth ministers frantically counting heads) everywhere. They were peaceful but passionate, carrying signs that said, “a person’s a person no matter how small” or “I survived Roe vs. Wade”.
In his letter to Timothy, Paul encourages him to “let no one have contempt for your youth, but set an example for those who believe, in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity” (1 Timothy 4:12). Teenagers aren’t perfect, but our trip to DC reminded me that thousands of teens are setting an example and standing up for what they believe in, including those in our hometown. If it takes a village, we should be proud and hopeful.
As much as I love teenagers, I concede that the wary glances they receive when they congregate in public are somewhat rightfully earned. I’ve seen kids at their best—when they’re serving the homeless and helping elderly cross the street—but I’ve also witnessed some pretty inconsiderate and apathetic behavior. For example, once while a speaker was telling the youth group about a project to deliver clean drinking water to the third world, a teen raised their hand and asked, “but they’re like, used to walking miles to get clean water. Why do we have to change that for them?”. I died a little on the inside, convinced somewhere an angel lost its wings and that there was no hope for the future if kids could be this apathetic and insensitive to those in need.
However, these past few weeks have left me pretty inspired and hopeful for this generation. Regardless of how you feel about the issue of Roe vs. Wade and abortion, I’ve been very encouraged that kids aren’t just “waiting on the world to change”.
Each year on the anniversary of Roe vs. Wade people opposed to and in favor of abortion congregate in Washington D.C. As a Catholic youth group (and fans of “Juno”), we have talked about abortion and many of my teens feel strongly that it should not be legal. They believe it’s affected their world, as they say, “like, Miss Alison, there have been over a million abortions each year? That’s probably why there are no cute boys in my class!”. They asked me if I would take them to D.C. to peacefully protest this law with others from around the country.
We went and it was no vacation. We slept on the bus and on the floor of a gym, didn’t shower for three days, ate peanut butter sandwiches and braved the cold weather to take a stand for what we believed in. We prayed for our country, our leaders and for a greater respect of all human life. Through it all they were peaceful, respectful, attentive and never complained about the challenges of the trip.
There were 32 youth and 13 adults from Hilton Head who joined 200,000 others in DC on January 22. What struck me and many others was how many of those gathered were teenagers. Journalist Robert McCartney and Roe vs. Wade supporter observed, “I was especially struck by the large number of young people” who attended. (Washington Post, Sunday, January 24, 2010). I too could not believe that I was not the only adult crazy enough to attempt such a trip, there were high schools, colleges and youth groups (and youth ministers frantically counting heads) everywhere. They were peaceful but passionate, carrying signs that said, “a person’s a person no matter how small” or “I survived Roe vs. Wade”.
In his letter to Timothy, Paul encourages him to “let no one have contempt for your youth, but set an example for those who believe, in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity” (1 Timothy 4:12). Teenagers aren’t perfect, but our trip to DC reminded me that thousands of teens are setting an example and standing up for what they believe in, including those in our hometown. If it takes a village, we should be proud and hopeful.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Comparisons = Trouble
If you’re a Bluffton Packet alert reader and caught last weeks “Pastor’s Corner”, you already know about my unpleasant encounter with the Georgia Highway Patrol that resulted in a “fast driving award” Thanksgiving weekend. I conceded that while no one likes to get a speeding ticket, the State Trooper had a point and the consequences for my dangerous behavior would help me to be safer in the future. It reminded me that as Christmas approaches, it’s good for us to take stock of our lives and see where we need to grow more. It’s not about a guilt trip, it’s about preparing our souls for heaven since much like speeding endangers our lives, sin endangers our souls.
A big mistake we make as we examine our lives is to simply compare ourselves to others. The teens in my youth group do this often. I hear, “Miss Alison, I’m in good shape. I go to church way more than my friends do and I’m like, a lot nicer than them too”. We all do this. How many people out there are patting themselves on the back saying, “I’m not trying too hard to be a good husband or wife, but at least I can beat Tiger Woods at something!” (Not to hate on Tiger, he’s just an easy example right now). There’s a plethora of celebrities and friends that if we were to look to them and compare our lives, we think we’re a-ok.
In The Screwtape Letters, C.S. Lewis writes from the perspective of a Demon teaching how to ensnare souls and drag them to hell. He reminds his charge to “work hard, then, on the disappointment or anticlimax which is certainly coming to the patient during his first few weeks as a churchman” when he compares himself to others and finds them less than perfect. Anyone who’s gone to Church has at one point or another looked at the way others are living and decided that compared to them, they’re saints, so the can rest easy for a while. This is dangerous because our goal isn’t to be better than everyone else, our goal is to be like Christ.
Allow me to provide an example. This morning, while the ink was still drying on the paper that told of the lessons I had learned, I approached the Cross Island Parkway in a cluster of about a dozen other cars, all going the same speed. It was a leisurely morning, I wasn’t running late, had been able to consume two cups of coffee and unlike the day before, no one cut me off pulling out from Point Comfort Road so I wasn’t tempted to careen past anyone to prove a point (that was Monday. And my apologies to the driver of the Navy Lexus, you just caught me at a bad time). Like I said, I wasn’t driving any differently from anyone else and I assumed we were all good.
You can imagine my surprise when I once again saw the blue lights flashing in my rearview. I figured the good officer was rushing to catch someone who, like me a few weeks ago, had been endangering the lives of others with reckless driving. I pulled over, pitying the fool that would undergo the same fate I had. But wait, what’s this? He was getting out! I wracked my brain, thinking that maybe my taillight was out or my tags had expired? Surely, it couldn’t be… “Ma’m, do you know why I pulled you over?” I had a sinking feeling it wasn’t because I was having a good hair day. “No…?” I smiled. “Ma’m, I clocked you at….” Well, I’ll leave the rest up to your imagination. Let’s just say it was déjà vu all over again.
The error of my ways was my assumption that everyone around me was going the speed limit. We all know that’s the danger of speed traps-- you get caught up in the flow of traffic. Slowing down would be inconvenient. Everyone else is doing it, how bad can it be? We just don’t notice how fast we’re going.
I have a very real fear that frogs will eat me, so I’ve never tested this, but I’ve been told that if you place a frog in boiling water, it will jump right out. However, if you place a frog in regular water and then gradually turn up the temperature the frog will die before it realizes it’s boiling to death. Sin is like that. No one wakes up in the morning and plans to disobey God, just like I don’t wake up in the morning planning to rack up speeding tickets. But we get caught up in the flow of the day and before we know it we’re gossiping, lying, cheating or maybe driving to fast because we’re just not paying attention.
The Gospel of Mark warns us that we need to always be ready for Christ’s return. “May he not come suddenly and find you sleeping. What I say to you, I say to all: ‘Watch!’” (Mark 13:36-37). As we examine our lives in preparation for when we will meet Christ face to face, we need to remember that “everyone else was doing it” is not a valid. This Christmas, remember that God has gave us the perfect model to follow when he condescended to come to earth as a baby in Bethlehem. Pay attention to what matters.
A big mistake we make as we examine our lives is to simply compare ourselves to others. The teens in my youth group do this often. I hear, “Miss Alison, I’m in good shape. I go to church way more than my friends do and I’m like, a lot nicer than them too”. We all do this. How many people out there are patting themselves on the back saying, “I’m not trying too hard to be a good husband or wife, but at least I can beat Tiger Woods at something!” (Not to hate on Tiger, he’s just an easy example right now). There’s a plethora of celebrities and friends that if we were to look to them and compare our lives, we think we’re a-ok.
In The Screwtape Letters, C.S. Lewis writes from the perspective of a Demon teaching how to ensnare souls and drag them to hell. He reminds his charge to “work hard, then, on the disappointment or anticlimax which is certainly coming to the patient during his first few weeks as a churchman” when he compares himself to others and finds them less than perfect. Anyone who’s gone to Church has at one point or another looked at the way others are living and decided that compared to them, they’re saints, so the can rest easy for a while. This is dangerous because our goal isn’t to be better than everyone else, our goal is to be like Christ.
Allow me to provide an example. This morning, while the ink was still drying on the paper that told of the lessons I had learned, I approached the Cross Island Parkway in a cluster of about a dozen other cars, all going the same speed. It was a leisurely morning, I wasn’t running late, had been able to consume two cups of coffee and unlike the day before, no one cut me off pulling out from Point Comfort Road so I wasn’t tempted to careen past anyone to prove a point (that was Monday. And my apologies to the driver of the Navy Lexus, you just caught me at a bad time). Like I said, I wasn’t driving any differently from anyone else and I assumed we were all good.
You can imagine my surprise when I once again saw the blue lights flashing in my rearview. I figured the good officer was rushing to catch someone who, like me a few weeks ago, had been endangering the lives of others with reckless driving. I pulled over, pitying the fool that would undergo the same fate I had. But wait, what’s this? He was getting out! I wracked my brain, thinking that maybe my taillight was out or my tags had expired? Surely, it couldn’t be… “Ma’m, do you know why I pulled you over?” I had a sinking feeling it wasn’t because I was having a good hair day. “No…?” I smiled. “Ma’m, I clocked you at….” Well, I’ll leave the rest up to your imagination. Let’s just say it was déjà vu all over again.
The error of my ways was my assumption that everyone around me was going the speed limit. We all know that’s the danger of speed traps-- you get caught up in the flow of traffic. Slowing down would be inconvenient. Everyone else is doing it, how bad can it be? We just don’t notice how fast we’re going.
I have a very real fear that frogs will eat me, so I’ve never tested this, but I’ve been told that if you place a frog in boiling water, it will jump right out. However, if you place a frog in regular water and then gradually turn up the temperature the frog will die before it realizes it’s boiling to death. Sin is like that. No one wakes up in the morning and plans to disobey God, just like I don’t wake up in the morning planning to rack up speeding tickets. But we get caught up in the flow of the day and before we know it we’re gossiping, lying, cheating or maybe driving to fast because we’re just not paying attention.
The Gospel of Mark warns us that we need to always be ready for Christ’s return. “May he not come suddenly and find you sleeping. What I say to you, I say to all: ‘Watch!’” (Mark 13:36-37). As we examine our lives in preparation for when we will meet Christ face to face, we need to remember that “everyone else was doing it” is not a valid. This Christmas, remember that God has gave us the perfect model to follow when he condescended to come to earth as a baby in Bethlehem. Pay attention to what matters.
Speeding, Glee and Georgia
I’ve given my friends and family strict instructions: if I ever say, “oh yeah, I’ll drive to Atlanta for Thanksgiving and then just drive home the Sunday afterwards”, they’re to hit me. Hard. And take away my car keys.
Most of my college friends have ended up in Atlanta since the high concentration of Catholic High Schools there affords more opportunities for us Theology Majors to be employed as professional Catholics. This thanksgiving we gathered to catch up, eat, and engage in the perpetual pastime of girls in their 20’s—try on bridesmaid dresses. But that’s another story.
It was all fun and games until I hit the road at 11:30 a.m. on Sunday morning, naively thinking I had left plenty of time to get back to Hilton Head for a 4:00 p.m. commitment. Maybe I would’ve, if I had opted to walk ride a vespa. However, 2:00 p.m. came and I had crawled about 30 miles in 2 hours. Epic Fail. I finally exited I-75 and may have gotten carried away singing along to my ”Glee” soundtrack as I was finally able to accelerate to the speed limit allowed… and some. My little Honda Civic bounded over a hill and right into the path of two state troopers, radar guns aimed and engines revved. It was a classic, “oh, fudge” moment. They both pulled out onto the road and proceeded to pull over me and another car.
I really am quite good at following rules. As a professional Catholic, I wear my seatbelt, stop at stop signs and even went back to the Hilton Head Airport to pay my parking fees in cash when the attendant was off duty and the “honor system” bucket didn’t allow me to use a credit card. However, I do sometimes drive a little fast. When I have kids in the car I’m overly cautious-- the phone goes unanswered, I stop at yellow lights, only make protected left-hand turns and drive 3.5 miles under the speed limit. However, when I drive alone I will use the time to apply lip gloss, text at red lights and crochet. (Ok, maybe just the first two.) I will also sometimes lose track of the speed limit and drive a bit fast. So, when those blue lights flashed in my rearview I knew that while this was not a happy moment, it was one that was a long time coming.
The state trooper was quite nice, I feel as though if we had met under other circumstances we would’ve had a lovely chat. He explained, apologetically, that he was out there to keep the crowded roads safe and my careening around several miles over the speed limit was problematic. I really couldn’t offer any excuses besides, “Sir, I’ve just been in a lot of traffic. I got impatient and carried away by the emotion of Glee’s rendition of ‘Defying Gravity’. I was going too fast. I’m sorry”. And, now, Bryan County will be richer thanks to my carelessness.
I’m still thoroughly annoyed, but my mother hopes that this officer gave me a necessary wake-up call that I was putting myself and others in danger. She’s definitely right in that way that mothers tend to be. Just yesterday I caught myself slowing down on the cross island as I remembered that I could not afford to make any more donations to the State Patrol. Being chastised caused me to regulate dangerous behavior.
I once spoke with a woman who, when she found out I was a youth minister, said, “Oh, Religion. It just makes people feel so guilty”. My response to her was, “Well, sometimes people need to feel guilty”. To clarify, I wasn’t speaking in judgment of her alone, but of humanity as a whole. In the Gospel of Mark, Christ says, “Do not think that I have come to abolish the law or the prophets. I have come not to abolish but to fulfill” (5:17). God became man so that we could have a perfect example of how to live. The Ten Commandments (the law) are a list of what we should not do, and in Christ we have the fulfillment of this law—a model of how to both avoid evil and do good. When we break the Ten Commandments and do things like lie, steal and cheat, we hurt others and put our souls in danger.
As unpleasant as a speeding ticket is, the state trooper had every right to point out I was breaking the law because I was putting myself and others in danger. In pointing out that I had done wrong (and giving me unpleasant consequences), it’s helping me change for the better. As Christmas approaches and we reflect on the coming of Christ, it would serve us and our communities if we allowed ourselves to be brutally honest with ourselves and look at what parts of our lives are in need of change. Reading the Bible, attending Church and allowing ourselves to be challenged by others shouldn’t be seen as a guilt trip but a chance to prepare our souls for heaven.
Most of my college friends have ended up in Atlanta since the high concentration of Catholic High Schools there affords more opportunities for us Theology Majors to be employed as professional Catholics. This thanksgiving we gathered to catch up, eat, and engage in the perpetual pastime of girls in their 20’s—try on bridesmaid dresses. But that’s another story.
It was all fun and games until I hit the road at 11:30 a.m. on Sunday morning, naively thinking I had left plenty of time to get back to Hilton Head for a 4:00 p.m. commitment. Maybe I would’ve, if I had opted to walk ride a vespa. However, 2:00 p.m. came and I had crawled about 30 miles in 2 hours. Epic Fail. I finally exited I-75 and may have gotten carried away singing along to my ”Glee” soundtrack as I was finally able to accelerate to the speed limit allowed… and some. My little Honda Civic bounded over a hill and right into the path of two state troopers, radar guns aimed and engines revved. It was a classic, “oh, fudge” moment. They both pulled out onto the road and proceeded to pull over me and another car.
I really am quite good at following rules. As a professional Catholic, I wear my seatbelt, stop at stop signs and even went back to the Hilton Head Airport to pay my parking fees in cash when the attendant was off duty and the “honor system” bucket didn’t allow me to use a credit card. However, I do sometimes drive a little fast. When I have kids in the car I’m overly cautious-- the phone goes unanswered, I stop at yellow lights, only make protected left-hand turns and drive 3.5 miles under the speed limit. However, when I drive alone I will use the time to apply lip gloss, text at red lights and crochet. (Ok, maybe just the first two.) I will also sometimes lose track of the speed limit and drive a bit fast. So, when those blue lights flashed in my rearview I knew that while this was not a happy moment, it was one that was a long time coming.
The state trooper was quite nice, I feel as though if we had met under other circumstances we would’ve had a lovely chat. He explained, apologetically, that he was out there to keep the crowded roads safe and my careening around several miles over the speed limit was problematic. I really couldn’t offer any excuses besides, “Sir, I’ve just been in a lot of traffic. I got impatient and carried away by the emotion of Glee’s rendition of ‘Defying Gravity’. I was going too fast. I’m sorry”. And, now, Bryan County will be richer thanks to my carelessness.
I’m still thoroughly annoyed, but my mother hopes that this officer gave me a necessary wake-up call that I was putting myself and others in danger. She’s definitely right in that way that mothers tend to be. Just yesterday I caught myself slowing down on the cross island as I remembered that I could not afford to make any more donations to the State Patrol. Being chastised caused me to regulate dangerous behavior.
I once spoke with a woman who, when she found out I was a youth minister, said, “Oh, Religion. It just makes people feel so guilty”. My response to her was, “Well, sometimes people need to feel guilty”. To clarify, I wasn’t speaking in judgment of her alone, but of humanity as a whole. In the Gospel of Mark, Christ says, “Do not think that I have come to abolish the law or the prophets. I have come not to abolish but to fulfill” (5:17). God became man so that we could have a perfect example of how to live. The Ten Commandments (the law) are a list of what we should not do, and in Christ we have the fulfillment of this law—a model of how to both avoid evil and do good. When we break the Ten Commandments and do things like lie, steal and cheat, we hurt others and put our souls in danger.
As unpleasant as a speeding ticket is, the state trooper had every right to point out I was breaking the law because I was putting myself and others in danger. In pointing out that I had done wrong (and giving me unpleasant consequences), it’s helping me change for the better. As Christmas approaches and we reflect on the coming of Christ, it would serve us and our communities if we allowed ourselves to be brutally honest with ourselves and look at what parts of our lives are in need of change. Reading the Bible, attending Church and allowing ourselves to be challenged by others shouldn’t be seen as a guilt trip but a chance to prepare our souls for heaven.
A Comittment of Your Lives
A few months ago a friend of mine asked if I could help chaperone his youth group at the National Catholic Youth Conference (NCYC). He had five girls going and needed a female adult to tag along and deal with feminine mysteries like chocolate cravings and crying for no reason. Luckily for him, I said “yes” and gave him my name for plane tickets before realizing that it put me out of town for the midnight showing of the new Twilight movie. This caused an existential crisis-- which comes first, God or fictional vampire heartthrobs?
God won, which is how I found myself in a crowd of 21,000 of Team Catholic’s high school and college aged members this past weekend. As we like to say, “there ain’t no party like a Catholic party cause a Catholic party don’t stop”, and NCYC was no exception. As our group of about sixty from South Carolina joined thousands of others to enter the Sprint Center in Kansas City for the first night, beachballs were tossed from Californians, glowsticks were waved by New Yorkers and beads were thrown by the crowd from New Orleans. Kids were chugging red bull, facebooking pictures and chanting the Jesus Camp traditional, “we love Jesus, yes we do, we love Jesus, how ‘bout you?” while adding a Catholic spin of, “hold up, wait a minute, put a little Mary in it”.
It was, honestly, one of the craziest crowds I’ve been in. And I’ve seen Dave Matthews at an outdoor venue where bags were not checked thoroughly, if you know what I mean.
What was different about this crowd is that these kiddos were out-of-their minds excited to be with other Catholic teens, worshiping God together. For teens in South Carolina which boasts a population that is a whopping 4.37 3% Catholic, it was an incredible opportunity to see just how many share their beliefs. And, for some, learn how to use a crosswalk in a city for the first time… but that’s another story. For kids that often feel very alone in their faith, it was a reminder that they are part of a universal Church.
In the year 2000, Pope John Paul II spoke of the Church and youth, saying, “Jesus wants to enter into dialogue with them and, through his body which is the Church, to propose the possibility of a choice which will require a commitment of their lives… the Church must become today the traveling companion of young people”. I’m not naive enough to think that just because these kids all showed up for a conference, they’re going to be perfect Christians. However, seeing these teens reminded me how much they’re thirsting for a chance to make the “commitment of their lives” that Pope John Paul II described.
The climax of this was a holy hour and procession held the next morning. Catholics believe that Jesus is present body, blood, soul and divinity in the communion we receive at Mass (we don’t mess around when we read John 6:56, but again, that’s a lesson for another column). Therefore, when we worship we often take time to reflect on this and be in this very real presence of God. When this time of worship began, 21,000 teens simultaneously dropped to their knees (which is not as easy as it sounds in stadium style-seating) and total silent adoration ensued. The teens I was with shared that they left that time feeling touched by God and challenged to take their faith more seriously.
The rest of the weekend included more time of prayer and worship as well as talks on improving ones relationship with God, service to others and making moral choices. Amidst all the craziness that ensues when that many teens gather, the overall message was a challenge to recognize that Christ reigns in their lives, and sometimes that means making decisions that are not easy or popular. And, while it’s always cool to be in a crowd of 21,000 that share your beliefs, it’s what you do when you’re alone or surrounded by those who don’t share your faith and only God is watching that really matters.
When Christ encountered the disciples on the road to Emmaus (Luke 24:13-35) he walked with them, listened and then explained the scriptures to them. They were overjoyed at this encounter and ran to Jerusalem, explaining that Christ “was made known to them in the breaking of the bread” (Luke 24:35). Just like the teens at NCYC, we all need the opportunity to encounter Christ, to be given the opportunity to commit our lives to the one who is greater than ourselves. This commitment won’t solve all your problems, but it does give you a companion in Christ and the Church.
God won, which is how I found myself in a crowd of 21,000 of Team Catholic’s high school and college aged members this past weekend. As we like to say, “there ain’t no party like a Catholic party cause a Catholic party don’t stop”, and NCYC was no exception. As our group of about sixty from South Carolina joined thousands of others to enter the Sprint Center in Kansas City for the first night, beachballs were tossed from Californians, glowsticks were waved by New Yorkers and beads were thrown by the crowd from New Orleans. Kids were chugging red bull, facebooking pictures and chanting the Jesus Camp traditional, “we love Jesus, yes we do, we love Jesus, how ‘bout you?” while adding a Catholic spin of, “hold up, wait a minute, put a little Mary in it”.
It was, honestly, one of the craziest crowds I’ve been in. And I’ve seen Dave Matthews at an outdoor venue where bags were not checked thoroughly, if you know what I mean.
What was different about this crowd is that these kiddos were out-of-their minds excited to be with other Catholic teens, worshiping God together. For teens in South Carolina which boasts a population that is a whopping 4.37 3% Catholic, it was an incredible opportunity to see just how many share their beliefs. And, for some, learn how to use a crosswalk in a city for the first time… but that’s another story. For kids that often feel very alone in their faith, it was a reminder that they are part of a universal Church.
In the year 2000, Pope John Paul II spoke of the Church and youth, saying, “Jesus wants to enter into dialogue with them and, through his body which is the Church, to propose the possibility of a choice which will require a commitment of their lives… the Church must become today the traveling companion of young people”. I’m not naive enough to think that just because these kids all showed up for a conference, they’re going to be perfect Christians. However, seeing these teens reminded me how much they’re thirsting for a chance to make the “commitment of their lives” that Pope John Paul II described.
The climax of this was a holy hour and procession held the next morning. Catholics believe that Jesus is present body, blood, soul and divinity in the communion we receive at Mass (we don’t mess around when we read John 6:56, but again, that’s a lesson for another column). Therefore, when we worship we often take time to reflect on this and be in this very real presence of God. When this time of worship began, 21,000 teens simultaneously dropped to their knees (which is not as easy as it sounds in stadium style-seating) and total silent adoration ensued. The teens I was with shared that they left that time feeling touched by God and challenged to take their faith more seriously.
The rest of the weekend included more time of prayer and worship as well as talks on improving ones relationship with God, service to others and making moral choices. Amidst all the craziness that ensues when that many teens gather, the overall message was a challenge to recognize that Christ reigns in their lives, and sometimes that means making decisions that are not easy or popular. And, while it’s always cool to be in a crowd of 21,000 that share your beliefs, it’s what you do when you’re alone or surrounded by those who don’t share your faith and only God is watching that really matters.
When Christ encountered the disciples on the road to Emmaus (Luke 24:13-35) he walked with them, listened and then explained the scriptures to them. They were overjoyed at this encounter and ran to Jerusalem, explaining that Christ “was made known to them in the breaking of the bread” (Luke 24:35). Just like the teens at NCYC, we all need the opportunity to encounter Christ, to be given the opportunity to commit our lives to the one who is greater than ourselves. This commitment won’t solve all your problems, but it does give you a companion in Christ and the Church.
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