A few months ago a friend of mine asked if I could help chaperone his youth group at the National Catholic Youth Conference (NCYC). He had five girls going and needed a female adult to tag along and deal with feminine mysteries like chocolate cravings and crying for no reason. Luckily for him, I said “yes” and gave him my name for plane tickets before realizing that it put me out of town for the midnight showing of the new Twilight movie. This caused an existential crisis-- which comes first, God or fictional vampire heartthrobs?
God won, which is how I found myself in a crowd of 21,000 of Team Catholic’s high school and college aged members this past weekend. As we like to say, “there ain’t no party like a Catholic party cause a Catholic party don’t stop”, and NCYC was no exception. As our group of about sixty from South Carolina joined thousands of others to enter the Sprint Center in Kansas City for the first night, beachballs were tossed from Californians, glowsticks were waved by New Yorkers and beads were thrown by the crowd from New Orleans. Kids were chugging red bull, facebooking pictures and chanting the Jesus Camp traditional, “we love Jesus, yes we do, we love Jesus, how ‘bout you?” while adding a Catholic spin of, “hold up, wait a minute, put a little Mary in it”.
It was, honestly, one of the craziest crowds I’ve been in. And I’ve seen Dave Matthews at an outdoor venue where bags were not checked thoroughly, if you know what I mean.
What was different about this crowd is that these kiddos were out-of-their minds excited to be with other Catholic teens, worshiping God together. For teens in South Carolina which boasts a population that is a whopping 4.37 3% Catholic, it was an incredible opportunity to see just how many share their beliefs. And, for some, learn how to use a crosswalk in a city for the first time… but that’s another story. For kids that often feel very alone in their faith, it was a reminder that they are part of a universal Church.
In the year 2000, Pope John Paul II spoke of the Church and youth, saying, “Jesus wants to enter into dialogue with them and, through his body which is the Church, to propose the possibility of a choice which will require a commitment of their lives… the Church must become today the traveling companion of young people”. I’m not naive enough to think that just because these kids all showed up for a conference, they’re going to be perfect Christians. However, seeing these teens reminded me how much they’re thirsting for a chance to make the “commitment of their lives” that Pope John Paul II described.
The climax of this was a holy hour and procession held the next morning. Catholics believe that Jesus is present body, blood, soul and divinity in the communion we receive at Mass (we don’t mess around when we read John 6:56, but again, that’s a lesson for another column). Therefore, when we worship we often take time to reflect on this and be in this very real presence of God. When this time of worship began, 21,000 teens simultaneously dropped to their knees (which is not as easy as it sounds in stadium style-seating) and total silent adoration ensued. The teens I was with shared that they left that time feeling touched by God and challenged to take their faith more seriously.
The rest of the weekend included more time of prayer and worship as well as talks on improving ones relationship with God, service to others and making moral choices. Amidst all the craziness that ensues when that many teens gather, the overall message was a challenge to recognize that Christ reigns in their lives, and sometimes that means making decisions that are not easy or popular. And, while it’s always cool to be in a crowd of 21,000 that share your beliefs, it’s what you do when you’re alone or surrounded by those who don’t share your faith and only God is watching that really matters.
When Christ encountered the disciples on the road to Emmaus (Luke 24:13-35) he walked with them, listened and then explained the scriptures to them. They were overjoyed at this encounter and ran to Jerusalem, explaining that Christ “was made known to them in the breaking of the bread” (Luke 24:35). Just like the teens at NCYC, we all need the opportunity to encounter Christ, to be given the opportunity to commit our lives to the one who is greater than ourselves. This commitment won’t solve all your problems, but it does give you a companion in Christ and the Church.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Mirror, Mirror
A few weeks ago I had a chance to visit with a priest I had become friends with while I was in Belize as a missionary. (In light of the last column I about the poker playing priest, I feel compelled to say that I have many friends who are not priests, but this is the Pastor’s Corner and not being a pastor myself, I feel like I have to throw in some anecdotes to keep the status quo.) Father Mark was in Florida to raise some funds for the missions. I met up with him in Jacksonville before he flew back to Central America. I wanted to go to confession before he left, so at the airport he checked in his bags and then we looked for a good place for me to spill my sins to God through one of His human representatives (questions about confession? Another article for another week).
Although many people pray in an airport it’s not easy to find a good place to pray out loud without seeming weird, so after vetoing Starbucks and those little shoe-shine stands, a security guard asked us if we were looking for a chapel. Maybe Father Mark’s collar gave it away, I don’t know. The guard pointed us to the “meditation room” which had a little praying stick figure on the sign outside. So far so good. We walked in and saw some chairs, a few bibles and in the center of the room was a sort of altar. It seemed normal enough, with flowers and a cloth but where there would normally be a cross instead there was a mirror. As someone used to saying mass at an altar with a cross above it, Father Mark looked at the set-up and said, “wow… God is… my image?”
Indeed. Such a large mirror made for a great place to check your hair, but as far as “meditation”, looking at ones reflection did not seem like the best way to ascend to union with the Divine. I’m not criticizing Jacksonville International Airport—(please take no offense since you already seem to have it in for me, making me throw away my hair product bottles that exceed carry-on regulations) – The “meditation room” was probably just something to do with the an old smoker’s lounge. The mirror just gave me a lot to think about.
When we pray, we are first striving for union with God but we also are seeking to know ourselves better. Sometimes looking at ourselves is not the best way to do this. I know that when I’m having a really good hair day, I don’t even notice if my socks don’t match til my friend is laughing at me (I wish I was pulling this example out of the air, but it’s happened). We can be so taken with how great we appear in some ways we don’t notice our faults. This can happen in the opposite way too—we get overwhelmed by our faults and can’t see what we do well -- but this seems less frequent in our self-esteem generation. In prayer, we need to see ourselves as we as God sees us. He doesn’t want us to leave Church with warm fuzzies if there’s things that we really need to change. In other words, he wants you to know if your socks don’t match.
St. Teresa of Avila, a Spanish mystic, warned against “imaginary virtue” explaining “the wiles of the devil are terrible; he will run a thousand times round hell if by doing so he can make us believe we have a single virtue which we have not”. We need to constantly examine our lives and especially our actions to see what virtues we lack and where we need to practice and improve. Now, let me clarify that I’m not advocating guilt—just an honest examination of how God is calling us to grow. This comes from looking not at a mirror but at Christ himself. St. Paul had caught on to this when he wrote to the Romans, saying, “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body doomed to death? God, thanks be to Him, through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 7:24-25).
Next time you think a mirror tells it all, look instead at Christ on the cross. Pull up “Passion of the Christ” on Google images and just stare at what the love of God looks like. He denied us nothing-- not even his only Son. Hebrews 12:4 reminds us, “in your struggle with sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood”. Don’t compare yourself with who you were a few years ago before you started your awesome bible study or with your neighbor who sleeps in instead of Church two out of four Sunday mornings. Look only to Christ’s example, rejoice in how He’s helped and continue to model your life after Him.
Although many people pray in an airport it’s not easy to find a good place to pray out loud without seeming weird, so after vetoing Starbucks and those little shoe-shine stands, a security guard asked us if we were looking for a chapel. Maybe Father Mark’s collar gave it away, I don’t know. The guard pointed us to the “meditation room” which had a little praying stick figure on the sign outside. So far so good. We walked in and saw some chairs, a few bibles and in the center of the room was a sort of altar. It seemed normal enough, with flowers and a cloth but where there would normally be a cross instead there was a mirror. As someone used to saying mass at an altar with a cross above it, Father Mark looked at the set-up and said, “wow… God is… my image?”
Indeed. Such a large mirror made for a great place to check your hair, but as far as “meditation”, looking at ones reflection did not seem like the best way to ascend to union with the Divine. I’m not criticizing Jacksonville International Airport—(please take no offense since you already seem to have it in for me, making me throw away my hair product bottles that exceed carry-on regulations) – The “meditation room” was probably just something to do with the an old smoker’s lounge. The mirror just gave me a lot to think about.
When we pray, we are first striving for union with God but we also are seeking to know ourselves better. Sometimes looking at ourselves is not the best way to do this. I know that when I’m having a really good hair day, I don’t even notice if my socks don’t match til my friend is laughing at me (I wish I was pulling this example out of the air, but it’s happened). We can be so taken with how great we appear in some ways we don’t notice our faults. This can happen in the opposite way too—we get overwhelmed by our faults and can’t see what we do well -- but this seems less frequent in our self-esteem generation. In prayer, we need to see ourselves as we as God sees us. He doesn’t want us to leave Church with warm fuzzies if there’s things that we really need to change. In other words, he wants you to know if your socks don’t match.
St. Teresa of Avila, a Spanish mystic, warned against “imaginary virtue” explaining “the wiles of the devil are terrible; he will run a thousand times round hell if by doing so he can make us believe we have a single virtue which we have not”. We need to constantly examine our lives and especially our actions to see what virtues we lack and where we need to practice and improve. Now, let me clarify that I’m not advocating guilt—just an honest examination of how God is calling us to grow. This comes from looking not at a mirror but at Christ himself. St. Paul had caught on to this when he wrote to the Romans, saying, “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body doomed to death? God, thanks be to Him, through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 7:24-25).
Next time you think a mirror tells it all, look instead at Christ on the cross. Pull up “Passion of the Christ” on Google images and just stare at what the love of God looks like. He denied us nothing-- not even his only Son. Hebrews 12:4 reminds us, “in your struggle with sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood”. Don’t compare yourself with who you were a few years ago before you started your awesome bible study or with your neighbor who sleeps in instead of Church two out of four Sunday mornings. Look only to Christ’s example, rejoice in how He’s helped and continue to model your life after Him.
The Poker Playing Priest
Ok. I have to brag. The “Poker playing priest” is a friend of mine. Seriously. He actually taught me how to play Texas Hold’em. What? You haven’t heard? Well, crawl out from under the rock and allow me to fill you in. A few weeks ago I got a call from Fr. Andrew Trapp, a priest who was ordained (made a priest) two years ago and spent his first year in ministry at St. Gregory the Great, here in Bluffton. When Team Catholic’s priests and youth ministers were not out leading young people on mission trips, retreats and lock-ins we’d sometimes gather and play poker (we didn’t have money, but we’d wager things like, “winner gets a free pass at nap time on the next mission trip”). Fr. Andrew’s a meticulous poker player. Before, when I’d occasionally play with friends I’d fake it by just looking for matching colors and shapes in my hand. However, Fr. Andrew would have none of that, he insisted on making sure we understood the lingo and now I know a full house beats a straight.
I digress. So Fr. Andrew has since been moved to a parish in Myrtle Beach that is attempting to raise funds for a new building. Father called and explained that he had figured out a way to aid in the fundraising and proceeded to explain the elaborate process of qualifying for the Pokerstars.Net Million Dollar Challenge reality show. He had to finish in the top ten in an on-line tournament that 10,000 participate in. If by some chance you do that, you can post a youtube audition video and if they like it they’ll interview you and maybe pick you to be on the show for a chance to play in several rounds against various celebrities and pros. If you win that you win a spot at a table to play for a million dollars.
I was half-listening when he finished with, “and last night I finished fifth in the on-line tournament”. “What?!” I was not expecting him to have already finished baby step number one to a million dollars. To make a long story short, with the permission of the Bishop, he made a youtube video that had just the right combination of paintball and poker to pique the interest of the directors and after winning on the first show, the building fund is 100,000 dollars richer. (To see highlights from this epic journey, youtube “poker playing priest”). He returns to the show in December for a chance to win a million dollars.
What I find so cool about this story, besides a friend being on T.V., is how Father Andrew has shown that Christians—even spiritual leaders—are not confined to reading the Bible and praying all day. In fact, much can be accomplished when Christians seek to engage the world where the world least expects it. Father Andrew clearly explained on his website (www.saintfactory.com) that he did not have to spend any money to win, nor did he use his church’s time (like other workers, priests get a certain amount of time off each year). What he also shared is that he had many interesting conversations with the cast and crew of the show. His goal was first to represent the priesthood well and then, hopefully, win some cash.
I see this as such a great example of “what would Jesus do?”. Looking at the life of Christ, he did not just hang out in the religious spots. He also hung out with tax collectors and prostitutes—he didn’t just chat with them on the street, he partied with them at their homes. While we have to share the Gospel in ways that we’re comfortable, we should be constantly evaluating our skills and talents to see what new places Christ is calling us to go. We can be quick to think that certain people or places are beyond the need for Christ— we think He came for our Sunday School class, but not those we play bunko or golf with. The reality is that we need to take the Gospel outside of Sundays and look for ways to bring Christ to the world… where they least expect it.
I digress. So Fr. Andrew has since been moved to a parish in Myrtle Beach that is attempting to raise funds for a new building. Father called and explained that he had figured out a way to aid in the fundraising and proceeded to explain the elaborate process of qualifying for the Pokerstars.Net Million Dollar Challenge reality show. He had to finish in the top ten in an on-line tournament that 10,000 participate in. If by some chance you do that, you can post a youtube audition video and if they like it they’ll interview you and maybe pick you to be on the show for a chance to play in several rounds against various celebrities and pros. If you win that you win a spot at a table to play for a million dollars.
I was half-listening when he finished with, “and last night I finished fifth in the on-line tournament”. “What?!” I was not expecting him to have already finished baby step number one to a million dollars. To make a long story short, with the permission of the Bishop, he made a youtube video that had just the right combination of paintball and poker to pique the interest of the directors and after winning on the first show, the building fund is 100,000 dollars richer. (To see highlights from this epic journey, youtube “poker playing priest”). He returns to the show in December for a chance to win a million dollars.
What I find so cool about this story, besides a friend being on T.V., is how Father Andrew has shown that Christians—even spiritual leaders—are not confined to reading the Bible and praying all day. In fact, much can be accomplished when Christians seek to engage the world where the world least expects it. Father Andrew clearly explained on his website (www.saintfactory.com) that he did not have to spend any money to win, nor did he use his church’s time (like other workers, priests get a certain amount of time off each year). What he also shared is that he had many interesting conversations with the cast and crew of the show. His goal was first to represent the priesthood well and then, hopefully, win some cash.
I see this as such a great example of “what would Jesus do?”. Looking at the life of Christ, he did not just hang out in the religious spots. He also hung out with tax collectors and prostitutes—he didn’t just chat with them on the street, he partied with them at their homes. While we have to share the Gospel in ways that we’re comfortable, we should be constantly evaluating our skills and talents to see what new places Christ is calling us to go. We can be quick to think that certain people or places are beyond the need for Christ— we think He came for our Sunday School class, but not those we play bunko or golf with. The reality is that we need to take the Gospel outside of Sundays and look for ways to bring Christ to the world… where they least expect it.
The Sea Turtle Massacre of '09
Heading home on the Cross Island Expressway was a breathtaking sight last night. It was one of those perfect nights when the road is empty and you can really appreciate the moon and its reflection on the water. Seeing the light shimmer off the Broad Creek I thought to myself, “I’m so glad to see an almost-full moon, knowing it lessens the likelihood of sea-turtle hatchlings dying as a result of attempts at romantic ambiance on the beach”. Yes. That’s seriously what I thought. After the community of Hilton Head watched in horror as dozens of sea turtles scrambled to their accidental death a few weeks ago, we’ve all probably come to a greater appreciation of how important the moonlight is.
In case you Bluffton folks missed the latest island news, a marriage proposal took a tragic turn when luminaries arranged to form a heart on the beach were left lit overnight. Dozens of baby sea turtles emerged from their nest and instinctively started scrambling in the direction of the light which they assumed to be reflecting off the water but were actually only candles stuck in the sand. None of them made it to the ocean and they died from exhaustion or at the hands—erm, claws—of snow crabs who emerged the clear winners in this story.
Regardless of how you feel about sea turtles, snow crabs, or any other aspect of the circle of life, one can imagine how pathetic it would have looked to see all those turtles scurrying away from the ocean. From our vantage, it’s obvious which is the moon and which is a paper bag, but from the turtle’s perspective it probably wasn’t so easy to tell the difference. Especially with all your newly hatched brothers and sisters also confused, it must have been easy to just go with the flow. The image got me thinking about how we often allow ourselves to be distracted in life.
The first commandment God gives the Israelites when He makes them His people is, “I the Lord, am your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, that place of slavery. You shall not have other Gods besides me” (Exodus 20:1-2). Throughout the Old Testament, people stray from God and worship everything from power to money to a golden calf. They fear that God isn’t who He promised, and their neighbors seem to be better off from burning inscence before a pile of gold.
We can look at the Israelites and roll our eyes, wondering how dumb can you be to put your faith in a golden cow. I mean, it makes for a nice Sunday school coloring page but that doesn’t really apply to us in the present. We’re very enlightened; we know who we are and where we are headed. Or do we?
I think that to God, sometimes we look a lot like those baby turtles. God creates each one of us to be with Him forever in heaven. This world is not our home. Sooner or later we’re going to die and depending on the choices we’ve made, our soul will spend eternity in heaven or hell. The Gospel of Matthew reminds us, “Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the road broad that leads to destruction, and those who enter through it are many. How narrow the gate and constricted the road that leads to life. And those who find it are few. Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing, but underneath are ravenous wolves” (Matthew 7:13-15).
Just like the turtles mistook the lanterns for the moon, lost track of the ocean and died following the wrong path, we can become entranced by idols in our lives and stray form our path to heaven. And it’s not always the obvious golden calf. We can get distracted by subtle things. What starts as skipping Church one Sunday for little league turns into skipping for a month cause we’re just too tired to get everyone together in the morning which turns into only going on Christmas and Easter... which turns into finding God in “nature” and wondering why our kids have taken up shaking tambourines in togas at the airport.
Maybe you think I’m exaggerating, but it’s true that once we allow our focus to stray from God, we risk never finding our way back. There are many things that compete to be gods in our lives, many things that are good and seem deserving of our attention. But we need to remember that ultimately, there is only one road that leads to heaven and one God to be followed.
In case you Bluffton folks missed the latest island news, a marriage proposal took a tragic turn when luminaries arranged to form a heart on the beach were left lit overnight. Dozens of baby sea turtles emerged from their nest and instinctively started scrambling in the direction of the light which they assumed to be reflecting off the water but were actually only candles stuck in the sand. None of them made it to the ocean and they died from exhaustion or at the hands—erm, claws—of snow crabs who emerged the clear winners in this story.
Regardless of how you feel about sea turtles, snow crabs, or any other aspect of the circle of life, one can imagine how pathetic it would have looked to see all those turtles scurrying away from the ocean. From our vantage, it’s obvious which is the moon and which is a paper bag, but from the turtle’s perspective it probably wasn’t so easy to tell the difference. Especially with all your newly hatched brothers and sisters also confused, it must have been easy to just go with the flow. The image got me thinking about how we often allow ourselves to be distracted in life.
The first commandment God gives the Israelites when He makes them His people is, “I the Lord, am your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, that place of slavery. You shall not have other Gods besides me” (Exodus 20:1-2). Throughout the Old Testament, people stray from God and worship everything from power to money to a golden calf. They fear that God isn’t who He promised, and their neighbors seem to be better off from burning inscence before a pile of gold.
We can look at the Israelites and roll our eyes, wondering how dumb can you be to put your faith in a golden cow. I mean, it makes for a nice Sunday school coloring page but that doesn’t really apply to us in the present. We’re very enlightened; we know who we are and where we are headed. Or do we?
I think that to God, sometimes we look a lot like those baby turtles. God creates each one of us to be with Him forever in heaven. This world is not our home. Sooner or later we’re going to die and depending on the choices we’ve made, our soul will spend eternity in heaven or hell. The Gospel of Matthew reminds us, “Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the road broad that leads to destruction, and those who enter through it are many. How narrow the gate and constricted the road that leads to life. And those who find it are few. Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing, but underneath are ravenous wolves” (Matthew 7:13-15).
Just like the turtles mistook the lanterns for the moon, lost track of the ocean and died following the wrong path, we can become entranced by idols in our lives and stray form our path to heaven. And it’s not always the obvious golden calf. We can get distracted by subtle things. What starts as skipping Church one Sunday for little league turns into skipping for a month cause we’re just too tired to get everyone together in the morning which turns into only going on Christmas and Easter... which turns into finding God in “nature” and wondering why our kids have taken up shaking tambourines in togas at the airport.
Maybe you think I’m exaggerating, but it’s true that once we allow our focus to stray from God, we risk never finding our way back. There are many things that compete to be gods in our lives, many things that are good and seem deserving of our attention. But we need to remember that ultimately, there is only one road that leads to heaven and one God to be followed.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
The Price is Faith
I have never understood money. I know it serves it’s purpose and I like it enough when I want a pair of shoes, but when it comes to understanding how much I have, how much I need and what the best thing is to do with it is, I am hopelessly confused. I was the kid in college who, when my parents called and asked if my checkbook was balanced, I’d say, “uh… I put my card in the ATM and money’s coming out, so… I guess…?” My first “job” out of college was a volunteer gig that paid $12 a week so the next two years didn’t afford much opportunity to practice (This weeks budget: a coke, two beers and a burrito. Done). Ever since then I’ve been in denial about money, spending less or more depending on how much I guessed I had. This sometimes works, but I’m finally admitting that this is not a very mature approach to life. I’m gradually coming to terms with the fact that just because I don’t understand money, find it incredibly boring and don’t see why I need to waste my time with it, it’s still very much a reality.
My roommate came home with a logical next step. Her church, Lowcountry Community, was beginning the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University. The website advertised skills in budgeting, investing and getting rid of debt. I could make a list of things I would rather be doing than thinking about these topics. It would begin with “getting a tooth filled” and end with “spend an afternoon at the DMV”, but that responsible voice in my head that gets ignored all to frequently won this argument, so Monday night found me sitting in a class while Dave Ramsey lectured me from a screen about investments and saving for retirement.
Hold up. Retirement? Good grief. I’m still paying off my college loans. I almost got up and left. I had begrudgingly signed up for this to learn to manage my money for now, not think forty years into the future. I can hardly get my act together enough to grocery shop for three days in advance. This was just too much.
However, when I finally stopped procrastinating and found myself sitting in my room with my bank statements, receipts and bills spread out around me on the floor, I had a reality check. It didn’t matter how I “felt” about money. It didn’t matter if I found it boring, if I’d rather be doing anything but think about it, if I’d rather plan my fall wardrobe than retirement. It was still there. (Or, as I’m realizing, not there.) And if I failed to learn how to manage it well, I would find myself at the age of retirement with a lot of problems that I could have avoided.
I’m sure most people are reading this thinking, “way to grow up, Al. Silly girl, it’s about time you started thinking about the reality of the future. You can’t just expect these things to work themselves out!”. I was foolish for many years and I’m finally being responsible. However, I would like to point out that my former approach to money is how many people approach their faith. They say that it’s boring, they don’t understand it, there’s a million things they’d rather be doing, that life is too busy to fit in things like praying and going to church. But the reality is, God is there whether we “understand” Him or not. If I don’t plan for the future, and even for retirement, I can’t expect it all to just work out.
We were all created with an eternal, immortal soul which will spend forever somewhere. Death, judgment, heaven and hell are a reality. Looking at savings spreadsheets, I’ve realized that I need to be investing in my future now because you can’t make it all up later. Similarly, you can’t expect Faith to appear by magic at the hour of your death. St. Augustine, a bishop who lived in the 400’s explained, “In order to see eventually, for the time being believe. Faith does the earning; sight is the reward. If you want to see before you believe, you’re demanding to be paid before the job.” That initial act of Faith, of believing in God and making Him a priority is an investment far more important than any account or 401k. St. Augustine explains, “What you want to see has it’s price. You want to see God; the price of such a tremendous good as that is faith.”
My roommate came home with a logical next step. Her church, Lowcountry Community, was beginning the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University. The website advertised skills in budgeting, investing and getting rid of debt. I could make a list of things I would rather be doing than thinking about these topics. It would begin with “getting a tooth filled” and end with “spend an afternoon at the DMV”, but that responsible voice in my head that gets ignored all to frequently won this argument, so Monday night found me sitting in a class while Dave Ramsey lectured me from a screen about investments and saving for retirement.
Hold up. Retirement? Good grief. I’m still paying off my college loans. I almost got up and left. I had begrudgingly signed up for this to learn to manage my money for now, not think forty years into the future. I can hardly get my act together enough to grocery shop for three days in advance. This was just too much.
However, when I finally stopped procrastinating and found myself sitting in my room with my bank statements, receipts and bills spread out around me on the floor, I had a reality check. It didn’t matter how I “felt” about money. It didn’t matter if I found it boring, if I’d rather be doing anything but think about it, if I’d rather plan my fall wardrobe than retirement. It was still there. (Or, as I’m realizing, not there.) And if I failed to learn how to manage it well, I would find myself at the age of retirement with a lot of problems that I could have avoided.
I’m sure most people are reading this thinking, “way to grow up, Al. Silly girl, it’s about time you started thinking about the reality of the future. You can’t just expect these things to work themselves out!”. I was foolish for many years and I’m finally being responsible. However, I would like to point out that my former approach to money is how many people approach their faith. They say that it’s boring, they don’t understand it, there’s a million things they’d rather be doing, that life is too busy to fit in things like praying and going to church. But the reality is, God is there whether we “understand” Him or not. If I don’t plan for the future, and even for retirement, I can’t expect it all to just work out.
We were all created with an eternal, immortal soul which will spend forever somewhere. Death, judgment, heaven and hell are a reality. Looking at savings spreadsheets, I’ve realized that I need to be investing in my future now because you can’t make it all up later. Similarly, you can’t expect Faith to appear by magic at the hour of your death. St. Augustine, a bishop who lived in the 400’s explained, “In order to see eventually, for the time being believe. Faith does the earning; sight is the reward. If you want to see before you believe, you’re demanding to be paid before the job.” That initial act of Faith, of believing in God and making Him a priority is an investment far more important than any account or 401k. St. Augustine explains, “What you want to see has it’s price. You want to see God; the price of such a tremendous good as that is faith.”
That Blessed Union...
This summer I’ve thought a lot about marriage. (Don’t worry, I only introduce myself that way in columns.). Anyways, there’s been a lot happening in the world to turn my thoughts in that direction. Some events have been positive-- the weddings and engagements of friends and family. Some have been negative— mock me if you want, but I’m taking Jon and Kate’s break up really hard, and I know none of us will ever think of the Appalachian Trail in the same way, if you know what I mean.
So marriage. “Marriage is what brings us together today… That blessed union, that dream within a dream” (props if you got the Princess Bride shout-out). But I think what we are learning is that for some, marriage isn’t necessarily the dream within a dream that the Disney princesses led us to believe. Many of the bridal shower and wedding reception conversations I’ve had with friends have drifted to all the negative press that marriage has been getting, leading us to wonder, “why are we, as a society, so bad at this? I mean, if Jon and Kate, with their organic meals and perfect hair couldn’t get it together for Aaden and his seven siblings, who stands a chance?”
I’d like to propose (no pun intended) that it’s because we’ve forgotten the point of marriage in the first place. Flipping through cards in the wedding section confirmed this suspicion as I opened to greetings that sounded more like they belonged on “get well” cards (No joke, I honestly read one that said “here’s hoping it all works out!”). Marriage seems to be in trouble. Not for want of self help books, because I think we get that men are from Mars and women are from Venus (and where does that leave us now that Pluto’s not a planet?). No, we’ve got astronomy down. To understand marriage, we need to understand God and His Church.
I can only speak for team Catholic, but marriage is a Sacrament. A sacrament is an outward sign instituted by Christ that gives us grace. I think of Sacraments as God’s answer to our ADHD society, knowing that we need tangible signs to remind us of Him and the grace He gives us to live our lives. Team Catholic has seven such signs that can be found in Scipture and passed down in Tradition from the time of Christ. All seven infuse grace into the moments of life when we need to remember that God is here (for example, Baptism to celebrate new life, Confession when we sin… you get the idea). These signs don’t replace God, but remind us of his presence in significant moments.
Although it may seem like it, Marriage was not created by Hallmark or David’s Bridal. God instituted marriage when he looked at Adam in the garden, surrounded by animals, yet realized that, “It is not good that man should be alone” (Genesis 2:18). When he sees Eve, Adam realizes that “This one, at last, is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh…” (Genesis 2:23), Genesis then tells us that this is why a man leaves his father and mother and the two of them become “one body” (Genesis 2:24). The union of man and woman began with Adam and Eve and continues throughout history.
You’re probably thinking, awh, yeah, that’s so sweet. Adam and Eve were, as we’d say in text-lingo, MFEO (made for each other). But what does that have to do with the Church? As was mentioned, sacraments are signs and in the case of marriage, it’s the sign of the union of Christ and the Church. Think about what God did for us here. In Ephesians 5:25, Paul reminds “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loves the Church…”. Christ loved the Church by offering up his whole life on the cross and continues to love us, waiting for the day that we join Him in heaven. God intends that every marriage we see be a reminder of this. Marriage is more than a joint mortgage and a minivan. It’s signifying Christ’s eternal love for the Church. When a man and a woman make vows to each other for as long as they live, Christ intended that it be a reminder to us of His faithfulness to us for eternity. Just like Christ didn’t live to serve himself in his life and death, husbands and wives look to Christ to remember that it’s about serving one another and the children that eventually come from their union.
My friend recently got married and she made spreadsheets for the ceremony and reception to clarify to her attendants who was to be present and when. When it came time to exchange the vows the “participants” column listed “Christ” above her and her fiancé to remind them, from the beginning, Who this was all about. It was her day, but she was very aware that she was about to follow Christ in a new way through being a sign of His love for the Church. Maybe not what a Disney princess would do, but a pretty incredible vocation nonetheless. When we look around and wonder what’s gone wrong, our first step should be looking to Christ’s love for the Church as the model of Love.
So marriage. “Marriage is what brings us together today… That blessed union, that dream within a dream” (props if you got the Princess Bride shout-out). But I think what we are learning is that for some, marriage isn’t necessarily the dream within a dream that the Disney princesses led us to believe. Many of the bridal shower and wedding reception conversations I’ve had with friends have drifted to all the negative press that marriage has been getting, leading us to wonder, “why are we, as a society, so bad at this? I mean, if Jon and Kate, with their organic meals and perfect hair couldn’t get it together for Aaden and his seven siblings, who stands a chance?”
I’d like to propose (no pun intended) that it’s because we’ve forgotten the point of marriage in the first place. Flipping through cards in the wedding section confirmed this suspicion as I opened to greetings that sounded more like they belonged on “get well” cards (No joke, I honestly read one that said “here’s hoping it all works out!”). Marriage seems to be in trouble. Not for want of self help books, because I think we get that men are from Mars and women are from Venus (and where does that leave us now that Pluto’s not a planet?). No, we’ve got astronomy down. To understand marriage, we need to understand God and His Church.
I can only speak for team Catholic, but marriage is a Sacrament. A sacrament is an outward sign instituted by Christ that gives us grace. I think of Sacraments as God’s answer to our ADHD society, knowing that we need tangible signs to remind us of Him and the grace He gives us to live our lives. Team Catholic has seven such signs that can be found in Scipture and passed down in Tradition from the time of Christ. All seven infuse grace into the moments of life when we need to remember that God is here (for example, Baptism to celebrate new life, Confession when we sin… you get the idea). These signs don’t replace God, but remind us of his presence in significant moments.
Although it may seem like it, Marriage was not created by Hallmark or David’s Bridal. God instituted marriage when he looked at Adam in the garden, surrounded by animals, yet realized that, “It is not good that man should be alone” (Genesis 2:18). When he sees Eve, Adam realizes that “This one, at last, is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh…” (Genesis 2:23), Genesis then tells us that this is why a man leaves his father and mother and the two of them become “one body” (Genesis 2:24). The union of man and woman began with Adam and Eve and continues throughout history.
You’re probably thinking, awh, yeah, that’s so sweet. Adam and Eve were, as we’d say in text-lingo, MFEO (made for each other). But what does that have to do with the Church? As was mentioned, sacraments are signs and in the case of marriage, it’s the sign of the union of Christ and the Church. Think about what God did for us here. In Ephesians 5:25, Paul reminds “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loves the Church…”. Christ loved the Church by offering up his whole life on the cross and continues to love us, waiting for the day that we join Him in heaven. God intends that every marriage we see be a reminder of this. Marriage is more than a joint mortgage and a minivan. It’s signifying Christ’s eternal love for the Church. When a man and a woman make vows to each other for as long as they live, Christ intended that it be a reminder to us of His faithfulness to us for eternity. Just like Christ didn’t live to serve himself in his life and death, husbands and wives look to Christ to remember that it’s about serving one another and the children that eventually come from their union.
My friend recently got married and she made spreadsheets for the ceremony and reception to clarify to her attendants who was to be present and when. When it came time to exchange the vows the “participants” column listed “Christ” above her and her fiancé to remind them, from the beginning, Who this was all about. It was her day, but she was very aware that she was about to follow Christ in a new way through being a sign of His love for the Church. Maybe not what a Disney princess would do, but a pretty incredible vocation nonetheless. When we look around and wonder what’s gone wrong, our first step should be looking to Christ’s love for the Church as the model of Love.
Father Gus
Originally published August 13
I received a text message on my way to Church last weekend that read, “Hey everybody… Fr. Gus died this morning in his sleep… pray for the repose of his soul and pass on this prayer.”
That text, or the event that it reported, put a lot in perspective that morning. Unlike most South Carolinians who to attend USC, Clemson and occasionally College of Charleston, my senior year of high school I set my sights on the small liberal arts school, Franciscan University of Steubenville in Ohio (that’s Steu BEN ville. Not “stupid ville”. Hometown of Dean Martin and most densely polluted air you’ll encounter outside of Beijing). Yes, in a switch from the norm, I loaded up a blue minivan and went to Ohio. What led me to attend college out of state and 12 hours away was the fact that this college was run by the Franciscans, an order of Catholic priests who follow the spirituality of St. Francis of Assisi.
St. Francis of Assisi, born in the early 1100’s, is famous as being the made into the only figurine to feed more birds than that “Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil” statue, but he is worth getting to know at a deeper level for his decision to renounce the wealth of his family and radically live all that is taught in the Scriptures, especially to serve Christ in the poor. Many chose to follow his example in the years that followed, to this day the Franciscans are some of Team Catholic’s most valuable players. St. Francis taught a life of conversion, that we’re to grow in holiness through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. This spirituality permeated my experience at college, The Franciscans taught us that following Christ, “the way, the truth and the life” meant pursuing both knowledge of God and of the world-- Faith and Reason-- to prepare us for the “real world”.
At an age where one makes decisions that affect the rest of their life (what should I do when I graduate? Should I get married? What do I actually believe? How would I look with a goatee?) Father Gus was a Franciscan on campus who lead us to focus on what was important, but with a loving example. He’d give students the coat off his back in the bitter Ohio winter, would never let a woman walk next to the road and spent hours each week in the dormitory chaplain’s office listening to students talk about anything and everything. He also had a mischievous sense of humor and would often tell everyone that no one remembered his birthday. When his fellow priests would ask why, he’s simply gesture knowingly to all the cakes that were being delivered to their house. He’d regularly put guys in headlocks and chase students down to try to trip them with his cane. He loved us and we knew it, which is why he could get away with calling us out on sin. He saw himself as our spiritual father, and knew that in the end, life was more than graduating and getting jobs and all the post college stuff we were preoccupied with. He was always reminding us that in the end, life was about getting to heaven.
When I received the text message about his death, I was overwhelmed that I now knew someone in heaven. It was like hearing that a friend had finally come home after a long trip. Everything in his life had been oriented towards this moment, when he’d leave earth and meet God face to face. I was not alone in this thought. Facebook statuses, twitters and texts shot around all afternoon from Franciscan graduates now spread out all over the U.S, saying things like, “Father Gus, put Jesus in a headlock ‘til I get there!” and “Pray for me until we meet again!”. The thought of the world minus Father Gus is sad, but as Church began that morning, all I could think was that I this was the mystery St. Paul described, “it is Christ in you, the hope for glory!” (Colossians 1:27). Fr. Gus’s life and death all reminded us what we hope for.
In college, I was encouraged to seek both faith and reason as I matured to adulthood. This is because we have all been created to be in Heaven. Forever. It’s so easy to get caught up in the minutia of day to day living and forget that this isn’t all there is. The life and death of someone like Father Gus snapped me out of my daily routine of checking facebook, hanging out with friends and deciding between a blackberry and iphone and gave me a reality check. I was reminded of what St. Paul told the Hebrews—“we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us rid ourselves of every burden and sin that clings to us and persevere in running the race that lies before us” (Hebrews 12:1). A cloud of witnesses is watching and waiting. Are you running to win?
I received a text message on my way to Church last weekend that read, “Hey everybody… Fr. Gus died this morning in his sleep… pray for the repose of his soul and pass on this prayer.”
That text, or the event that it reported, put a lot in perspective that morning. Unlike most South Carolinians who to attend USC, Clemson and occasionally College of Charleston, my senior year of high school I set my sights on the small liberal arts school, Franciscan University of Steubenville in Ohio (that’s Steu BEN ville. Not “stupid ville”. Hometown of Dean Martin and most densely polluted air you’ll encounter outside of Beijing). Yes, in a switch from the norm, I loaded up a blue minivan and went to Ohio. What led me to attend college out of state and 12 hours away was the fact that this college was run by the Franciscans, an order of Catholic priests who follow the spirituality of St. Francis of Assisi.
St. Francis of Assisi, born in the early 1100’s, is famous as being the made into the only figurine to feed more birds than that “Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil” statue, but he is worth getting to know at a deeper level for his decision to renounce the wealth of his family and radically live all that is taught in the Scriptures, especially to serve Christ in the poor. Many chose to follow his example in the years that followed, to this day the Franciscans are some of Team Catholic’s most valuable players. St. Francis taught a life of conversion, that we’re to grow in holiness through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. This spirituality permeated my experience at college, The Franciscans taught us that following Christ, “the way, the truth and the life” meant pursuing both knowledge of God and of the world-- Faith and Reason-- to prepare us for the “real world”.
At an age where one makes decisions that affect the rest of their life (what should I do when I graduate? Should I get married? What do I actually believe? How would I look with a goatee?) Father Gus was a Franciscan on campus who lead us to focus on what was important, but with a loving example. He’d give students the coat off his back in the bitter Ohio winter, would never let a woman walk next to the road and spent hours each week in the dormitory chaplain’s office listening to students talk about anything and everything. He also had a mischievous sense of humor and would often tell everyone that no one remembered his birthday. When his fellow priests would ask why, he’s simply gesture knowingly to all the cakes that were being delivered to their house. He’d regularly put guys in headlocks and chase students down to try to trip them with his cane. He loved us and we knew it, which is why he could get away with calling us out on sin. He saw himself as our spiritual father, and knew that in the end, life was more than graduating and getting jobs and all the post college stuff we were preoccupied with. He was always reminding us that in the end, life was about getting to heaven.
When I received the text message about his death, I was overwhelmed that I now knew someone in heaven. It was like hearing that a friend had finally come home after a long trip. Everything in his life had been oriented towards this moment, when he’d leave earth and meet God face to face. I was not alone in this thought. Facebook statuses, twitters and texts shot around all afternoon from Franciscan graduates now spread out all over the U.S, saying things like, “Father Gus, put Jesus in a headlock ‘til I get there!” and “Pray for me until we meet again!”. The thought of the world minus Father Gus is sad, but as Church began that morning, all I could think was that I this was the mystery St. Paul described, “it is Christ in you, the hope for glory!” (Colossians 1:27). Fr. Gus’s life and death all reminded us what we hope for.
In college, I was encouraged to seek both faith and reason as I matured to adulthood. This is because we have all been created to be in Heaven. Forever. It’s so easy to get caught up in the minutia of day to day living and forget that this isn’t all there is. The life and death of someone like Father Gus snapped me out of my daily routine of checking facebook, hanging out with friends and deciding between a blackberry and iphone and gave me a reality check. I was reminded of what St. Paul told the Hebrews—“we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us rid ourselves of every burden and sin that clings to us and persevere in running the race that lies before us” (Hebrews 12:1). A cloud of witnesses is watching and waiting. Are you running to win?
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